The honesty List.. 5 things that hold you back training

[chriscrudelli]

Writing things down and sharing them can be massively helpful in personal development.
I long believed only with brutal honesty can you evolve quickly.
share the 5 things (excuses) that hold you back and for each point give an example of how you can mitigate it in order to overcome it.
Come back later and let us know how it worked out and if it was helpful to do this.

[Osensei]

5 things

1 work.
2. Tiredness
3 currently the lock down
4. Time
5. Can't be arsed.

you said truthful sifu.

1. Unless it's total lock down I can't change this.
2. Change sleep pattern go to bed earlier. Currently I'm waiting for a sleep study for apnea it may be that I'm not getting enough oxygen at night.
3. Currently with the lock down its only training at home no gym swim once a day run.
4. Time being at work all day then getting tired. With kids and family at home it's hard but not impossible to fit 10 mins to 60 mins.
5 speaks for itself. I suffer from depression and find it hard to motivate myself. But always up for a challenge when I can boost my frame of mind.

oss osensei

[chriscrudelli]

Thanks for the share. Keep working on it! Keep us updated.

[aussie5682]

Below are my reasons or excuses of why I hold back on training and how I plan to overcome it. This is not holding anything back and being 100% truthful.

Excuse	How I plan to overcome it
1. I am working all the time	1. Plan my hours of work and then schedule in a time to practice my martial arts training
2. I feel like I am no good and not knowing what to do	2. Get feedback from Sifu and other experts in class and carry on practicing
3. Fear of looking stupid in front of people	3. Carry on doing what I have been told and shown and ignore the doubts of looking stupid
4. Lack of motivation	4. Will get motivation from seeing what other people have done and holding me to account. Likewise, find that 'something' inside me to complete the task set.
5. Being over burdened and overwhelmed with lots of information and knowledge	5. Try to not to take to much on and ask people to understand the issue I have when I get the feeling of overwhelm

[chriscrudelli]

Great comments did it help writing them down here?

[aussie5682]

Oh yeah, defintley helped writing these down. Was a very good exercise to do I think. Thank you for the inspiration

[kungfubear]

chriscrudelli SIFU Q: Share the 5 things (excuses) that hold you back and for each point give an example of how you can mitigate it in order to overcome it.

100% Brutal honesty

Excuses that hold me back	Moving past those perceived obstacles
Feel run down and tired, worried about getting sick or overdoing it.	Notice that feeling when it arises and check-in as to whether it's fear-based rather than physical symptoms. Remember: The better condition I am in, the longer my transplant will last, the more energy I will have and feel better overall!
Not seeing results quickly enough, feeling like it's pointless to proceed.	Try not to be attached to results. Easier said than done as you cannot 'try' not to be attached. So to simply be aware of that feeling and let it flow through rather than control my behaviour. Remember: I am getting results no matter what, when I was eating poorly and not moving much, those results snuck up on my without realising. Enjoy moving my body and getting stronger with each step I take, no matter how small, it compounds over time.
My mind gives up easily, wants to move onto something new again. This has happened a lot over my life so far, I get excited about something and it feels right to do it, then sometimes even hours later I have a change of heart.	Martial arts has been on my mind for years, but I have repressed doing it because of a bad experience at Karate classes as a child. Just know that the past doesn't equal the future, reflect on the karate classes and unpick how I felt about it. Remember: The mind often does what it wants, a lot of what I've 'learned' over my lifetime was from others. Forget the future (apart from the longer term goal in my mind's eye) and take it exercise by exercise.
Liking a rough structure but dislike keeping routines, I like doing things when I feel like it or inspired. But feel guilt when I don't do things.	Be aware of when I feel this way, there is no right way in terms of when you want to practice or exercise. Think about and Do what works for me. Remember: "What a man achieves through Effort is little. As compared to what the achieves through Innocence."
Wonder why I am doing it in the first place, then stop because I rationalise that it's not right for me because 'X' reason.	Do some proper reflecting on 'Why' I am practicing martial arts and getting fit. Remember: People do many things reflexively, but not many people reflect on why they do something.

[chriscrudelli]

Some excellent and deep insights here. Did it help formalising the thoughts? Has this helped up your game

[kungfubear]

Thank Sifu, this reflection has helped. We all have perceived limitations, and we can find a way past them.

[Jackie]

[chriscrudelli]

Thanks for the share Jackie! Let us know if you are able to enact any of your solouyions and how they help.

[Jackie]

[Jackie]

A solution for jogging/ speed walking if you are a single parent with a toddler

[Ljgale]

Things that hold me back:

1 - Time - Feeling i have too much to do in 1 day can leave me overwhelmed / stressed

2- Overthinking - in perticular, when the above happens i tend to spend more time thinking than acting which leads to not completing important tasks and more stress

3 - Self discipline - often very good an attentive in a classroom environment / dojo but find it hard to motivte myself to train alone

4 - Fear - can often be a pessimist particularly when trying new activities and feel the worst will happen, this can lead to not fully committing to an exercise

5- Apathy - When sitting on the couch with a cider just becomes too appealing compared to training, particularly after work!

How I can overcome this:

1&2 - Create a schedule and where possible stick to it! use something like the 5 minute diary with built in reflection time then discipline myself to use the rest of my time acting. when building this schedule, think about what really needs to be in there and will completing this task add any value.

3- Stick to the above schedule and use the current climate to become more self resilient. working from home should aid providing these skills

4- consider how often worst case scenario actually happens along with taking positive steps to minimising the chances of this and improving confidence in the task I am scared of

5 - Allow sufficient rest time within my schedule. look to put more of my training in the morning and before work


thank you for the exercise Sifu, its powerful seeing this in black and white!

[chriscrudelli]

Brilliant honesty, excellent insights. Let me know what changes occur in the coming weeks

[Newguy1]

This a list of the things that i believe are holding me back....

1) Fitness. I feel like i can't train as i would like to because of fitness reasons. I want to train hard but my fitness works against me after a certain amount of time.

I work on my overall fitness everyday whether running, press ups, stretching, horse stance or planking. I hope as time goes on this will be improved on so i can train for longer.

2) Concentration. I sometimes struggle to put into action what i want to do because of distractions around the house etc.

I try to ignore my phone as much as possible and train outside or in my garage to decrease distractions as much as possible.

3) No planning. Need to plan what i want to train before i start training. Rather than make it up as i go along.

When i get 5 mins during the day im going to try and plan my routine so i can train better.

4) Lazyness. Weekends i find hard to get motivated to train sometimes. Especially if i have started doing other things before hand.

Be more disciplined and start to train first thing when i wake up.

5) Tiredness. Holds my training back for obvious reasons.

I need to manage my time i go to bed and wake up much better to counter this.

[chriscrudelli]

[Paul J]

The honesty List.. 5 things that hold you back training
1) Privacy/Space 2) Clear Motive (goal)/being overwhelmed
3) Other distractions /Time
4) Other training/teaching
5) Life

The above are all related and are a result of my own progression and the emphasis of training has now shifted.
1) During my beginnings, I was lucky that my kids and wife were regularly at some activity out of the house which meant I had the personal space to train, kitchen or lounge or garden. Now the kids are grown my wife is consistently around the house. This is not to blame her of course, but training is a personal thing for me. Solution? Agree a plan for my own space /time to train uninterrupted.

2) As a beginner in martial arts, goals are simple. Learn that kick, practice that Kata etc. As time goes on there are fewer specific goals, but there is everything to practice that you ever learnt, plus essential maintenance like Stretching, cardio, meditation etc. So there is a massive amount to do. Solution? Have a specific goal plus a programme for essential maintenance tasks. Review and change goals regularly.

3) We all have limited time to fulfil the things we feel we should do with our spare time, just a few hours in the evening. I do set aside an hour to two hours for personal training when I am not at another class, so this maybe 2/3 nights during the week. Solution? See 2&3 above.

4) I am often distracted from my personal training goals by attending the club where I instruct and other classes where I train (2/3 times a week) I am perhaps preparing lesson plans or perhaps attending classes without a clear goal other than this being a routine and time to socialise! Solution? Teaching is important! Socialising and regular training is important. But it is still possible to have goals and focus (see plans above).

5) Life gets in the way. Practicing the Artform becomes a way of life but this shouldn't mean that we spend the rest of our lives endlessly practicing our kicks, our punches and Kata. Solution? Accept that things come along but learn to apply the lessons learnt in the class to everything. Accept that going for a walk can be as valuable as practicing techniques. Helping friends or colleagues, dealing with problems are all valid and relevant to applying the Art.

[chriscrudelli]

Good insight, accepting things change. Viewing problems outside the box. I agree you need more specific challenges and goals to keep making new headway. Great

[skinn]

1. Tiredness

For years I have had problems getting good quality sleep. Because of this I try to spend at least half hour each morning doing qi qong, However I'm not always disciplined in keeping to my routine and when I do miss a session the difference in my mood is noticeable. I found standing in the morning only works for a few hours in terms of energy however it has shown me that this is something I can control and change to a degree.

2. Allowing myself to be distracted.

I try to start training as soon as possible when I get in from work on an evening before getting caught up by other distractions / excuses. I struggle the most at the weekend if i'm not training with anyone else as it's tempting to put training off until later on.

3. Laziness.

Sometime have to fight with not wanting to do anything. A simple trick which works for me is to tell myself i'll train for just 10 -20 minutes, usually this ends up turning into an hour or more.

4. Lack motivation

Find this mostly when I've not varied my training for a while or feel I am not progressing. Although I try not to just train things I feel more comfortable with I will change my training if i feel i've hit a brick wall and have become frustrated. It usually help when returning back to it a day or two later.

5. Injury or generally feeling run down

It's sometimes hard not to give in to an injury and use it as an excuse to do nothing. I have problem with my archilles from time to time and this can put me off training. Sometimes it is best to do nothing and just recuperate, but also training in a different way which won't aggravate the problem is an option. It can be difficult to be honest with ones self though. On my archilles issue I try to remind myself that training doesn't make it any worse in the general sense and that overall it helps alleviate the problem.

[chriscrudelli]

Honest insights, I wonder if lifestyle changes in terms of health, nutrition, stress management might ease the burden.
Also training first thing in the morning as a reward before work, might this reset the body clock to sleep deeper and earlier

[James Tae]

[chriscrudelli]

Clearly some progress and a large helping of compassion. Did you find this excercise of writing and thinking clearly empowering

[James Tae]

[SteveVanDunk]

[chriscrudelli]

[Rich]

[chriscrudelli]

Clear concise practice advice for yourself and all others who read this! Nice one Richard.

[Marie-louise]

[chriscrudelli]